[NOOO HELP NOT THE GENUINE SMILE SOMETHING IS DEFINITELY WRONG WITH D. MATSUI JUST OUT HERE ASSUMING IT'S DEEP TRAUMA SO HE'S JUST FEELING BAD FOR D. Maybe he'll get less Catholic with time again... Maybe it'll be fine...
He gives D's paws a gentle squeeze though because even with this coated in so much Catholicism, he doesn't necessarily disagree that death is more merciful than life.]
They had already suffered through a great deal, and death was what awaited them regardless of how it came. Unfortunately, the moment the Shogunate decided to set an example, and the moment enough people decided it would be a potential way to ensure nothing so bloody ever happened again, their fates were set in stone.
[OH I DIDN'T CAPITALIZE MY GODLY PRONOUNS I AM GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL NOW!!!]
I know...
[Humans can die sometimes. Hehe. (He cares about it right now because he's been made holy. Maybe he should be evil Catholicism.]
It was a little too much for the others... Rin and I were with the Shogunate, and Miss Shenhe and Rang were with the rebels. We saw those from home, and we saw some from here.
[DON'T BE EVIL CATHOLICISM. GOES TO HELL WITH YOU AND TAKES D WITH US
Matsui is quiet for a second, closing his eyes again for a brief moment. By now he's scraped together more or less what's happened, but every little scrap of confirmation he gets is an unpleasant one anyway. Thanks he hates it here for himself and also all of them!]
...Yes. That is... what's expected, as far as I am aware. [Based on his own terrible ventures.] I am sorry. I'm sorry that this happened to you. I know that sorry does nothing...
[Apologies do nothing, promises do nothing, everything does nothing! And even though he's exempting himself with his remarks, Matsui is assigning him trauma anyway because he truly just assumes his new religious identity is a trauma response. Fucking help.]
I have already spoken to the others, but if there is anything at all that I can do to help counterbalance this weight...
[He shakes his head a little. They are still here at the bench of penance, holding prayer hands.]
You don't have to worry. I feel better now after returning. As horrible as it is, maybe Rang and Miss Shenhe should have as well. It seems all of the injuries are gone.
[Hehe except for the mental ones. :> YEAH!]
I am sorry I thought so little of you and Buzen, Mr. Matsui. Being the tools of men, I had judged you too soon, and I had not understood until now.
[NOT LIKE THISSSSS HEEEELP. Matsui just looks faintly grim at that. He fucking murdered one of those two. It's fine. Maybe he'll go back and kill the other one too.]
Death is a peaceful sleep, after all.
[NO IT ISN'T BUT NO ONE WILL CONVINCE HIM OTHERWISE NOW. The mental wounds remain and death doesn't heal those but at least it allows for everyone to hit the pause button and simply not feel traumatized for a while because they aren't feeling anything at all. Yeah!
Matsui is a little taken aback by the rest of this though. HELLO?? D??? D HELLO. After a second, he just shakes his head.]
...You-- Tools like us stand against what you work for. Your judgment is not unjust. After all, even if we are used to protect and defend, we still do so through spilling blood...
Also unfortunately he does agree with that. He is very much of the opinion that he didn't ask for any of this and he didn't want any of this but now he just kind of has to deal.]
...It is-- frustrating. To be pulled from place to place in life like this.
[Even now, they're bound by the mission to succeed or face an even worse fate, damn humans to something far more horrific than death.]
But I suppose it is like that for us all. No one has full say in what their life looks like.
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no subject
He gives D's paws a gentle squeeze though because even with this coated in so much Catholicism, he doesn't necessarily disagree that death is more merciful than life.]
They had already suffered through a great deal, and death was what awaited them regardless of how it came. Unfortunately, the moment the Shogunate decided to set an example, and the moment enough people decided it would be a potential way to ensure nothing so bloody ever happened again, their fates were set in stone.
no subject
I know...
[Humans can die sometimes. Hehe. (He cares about it right now because he's been made holy. Maybe he should be evil Catholicism.]
It was a little too much for the others... Rin and I were with the Shogunate, and Miss Shenhe and Rang were with the rebels. We saw those from home, and we saw some from here.
no subject
Matsui is quiet for a second, closing his eyes again for a brief moment. By now he's scraped together more or less what's happened, but every little scrap of confirmation he gets is an unpleasant one anyway. Thanks he hates it here for himself and also all of them!]
...Yes. That is... what's expected, as far as I am aware. [Based on his own terrible ventures.] I am sorry. I'm sorry that this happened to you. I know that sorry does nothing...
[Apologies do nothing, promises do nothing, everything does nothing! And even though he's exempting himself with his remarks, Matsui is assigning him trauma anyway because he truly just assumes his new religious identity is a trauma response. Fucking help.]
I have already spoken to the others, but if there is anything at all that I can do to help counterbalance this weight...
no subject
You don't have to worry. I feel better now after returning. As horrible as it is, maybe Rang and Miss Shenhe should have as well. It seems all of the injuries are gone.
[Hehe except for the mental ones. :> YEAH!]
I am sorry I thought so little of you and Buzen, Mr. Matsui. Being the tools of men, I had judged you too soon, and I had not understood until now.
no subject
Death is a peaceful sleep, after all.
[NO IT ISN'T BUT NO ONE WILL CONVINCE HIM OTHERWISE NOW. The mental wounds remain and death doesn't heal those but at least it allows for everyone to hit the pause button and simply not feel traumatized for a while because they aren't feeling anything at all. Yeah!
Matsui is a little taken aback by the rest of this though. HELLO?? D??? D HELLO. After a second, he just shakes his head.]
...You-- Tools like us stand against what you work for. Your judgment is not unjust. After all, even if we are used to protect and defend, we still do so through spilling blood...
no subject
It’s probably fine.]
That is true, but… you were never asked to be made, and you were never asked to be spiritually summoned. Humans did such a thing all on your own.
…Like the animals, you are only doing what it is in your nature to do. Like instincts.
no subject
Also unfortunately he does agree with that. He is very much of the opinion that he didn't ask for any of this and he didn't want any of this but now he just kind of has to deal.]
...It is-- frustrating. To be pulled from place to place in life like this.
[Even now, they're bound by the mission to succeed or face an even worse fate, damn humans to something far more horrific than death.]
But I suppose it is like that for us all. No one has full say in what their life looks like.