[ for all that jonas has made fun of jocks today, he's still finding himself drawn to the park. admittedly, it's nice to be outside. he doesn't mind the city and he doesn't mind inside, but after the last week being able to stretch his legs and just have a place to go and get away from most of the people here for a bit is nice.
which is sort of what his thought is while he's at one of the lakes in said-park, at least until he sees D and probably t-chan nearby. i don't know t-chan's life anna you tell me. ]
Think it's an apology for being stuck in McDonald's all day Saturday?
Yes, D is out in the park vibing. He is under a tree for the shade because he was out in the sun in other PCs for, like, five minutes and that was ENOUGH for him. T-chan is also there, lounging beside him.
T-chan lifts his head to regard Jonas.]
I will accept this apology gladly. [He's bias.] Hello, Jonas.
[ WHY DO YOU AND AKI DO THIS TO ME. fucking demons.
speaking of demons, he is not entirely surprised that d is in the shade. he was fine being in the sun but he will mosey over to join both of them by this tree. ]
Hey. Looks like you two are definitely enjoying it.
[ terrible thanks. anyway yeah, he will go ahead and have a seat on the ground under the tree. ]
What am I--[ he does not get very far in his sentence when d shushes him, so he goes quiet. okay. we are going to appreciate nature, he guesses. he doesn't close his eyes or anything but he is at least silent as he seems to take in everything around them.
weird. it does feel kind of zen? also i hate that he really is just not going to talk now while they're doing this. ]
[He sits there with his head back, eyes closed. His breathing is relaxed, and he doesn’t say anything at all. He looks as otherworldly as the noises of nature: pale and androgynously beautiful and somehow hypnotizing in it.
The birds, the movement of the leaves, the fullness of the silence; his expression is so fond and serene. As if this is one of the greatest things he could do with his time.
It takes a few moments, and then he opens his eyes with a small smile to Jonas.]
Did you hear it? The voice of nature. It speaks all the time.
[ how is it that you still manage to do this. jonas is busy more observing the park and observing d and taking a few moments to just...maybe think about what it'd be like if they didn't have to erase each other.
so when d opens his eyes, jonas kind of grins in return. ]
It's more like...I can probably hear it but I'm not sure I can understand what it's saying. You know? [ tilting his head back to squint at the sun. ] But it's kind of nice to listen to anyway considering...everything.
What Jonas says doesn't seem to surprise him much.] You are only one of many who aren't able to understand, but I assure you, the words are simple and clear. [HE'S SUCH A WEIRD GOTH HIPPIE GUY.]
Feel like filling me in then? [ the worst of this is that i really have met people like this since living here. but alas. jonas is thinking about this, and with the question he frowns again. ]
Not in the slightest. I always figured being dead would mean not needing to eat or sleep and not being stressed out but one of those things can't be true if the other is.
I thought perhaps it was death and then rebirth. And maybe it will be so, in the end. Maybe this is the blip of time between--dying and being reborn again.
[He glances at Jonas, still with that slight smile.]
That's what the words are. What nature says if you listen. That life is born and then life expires, and then it begins again. On and on.
[ ...okay well. i hate this, because jonas is actually really, strongly considering this. he seems to be thinking about it and is silent in his thoughts. life is born and then life expires and then it begins again. it's like...not quite something he's thought about. ]
...does that apply to all life, you think? Or just some lives that're selected by somebody else?
[Jonas is a soft boy! This is funny, but unfortunately, D is a bit endeared by the earnestness at least.]
In a way--in different ways--I think it applies to all life. Regardless of what comes in between, like this, or what people think may come after. Life begins and life ends, and that is how it goes. The natural order of the world.
[ are you sure this is about jonas being soft, anna. ]
Right. No, that...could be a plausible way of life. I could see how it'd happen. [ ...this is not really the same, but it's tangentially related and he figures explaining might add context. ] ...I get that people don't really believe in, like, something higher or salvation or whatever you want to call it. But it's what my mom believed and it's sort of...I hadn't thought about it for a while. And I guess I started thinking about it again after we woke up here or whatever so. I don't know.
Maybe that's just another part of why I don't know if we're really dead or not.
[He can be soft with some spice of depression to keep it flavorful???
He turns his head a little to watch Jonas curiously. His expression is unreadable, but not harsh or mocking.]
There very well could be an after once this is through. Or each one of us could be different, could follow what we believe. I begin again, and you go to a paradise for reunion.
[He is quiet for a moment.]
Does to make you feel connected to her to believe in what she had?
[ honestly. he's too tired to even pretend to be surprised d read between the lines of all of that and it's not like it was a secret? it's also just that unfortunately d is literally the only person who knows now except for alex. why. how. ]
Could be. I heard the reapers were giving different answers on what happens to the erased souls or whatever, so that could be it. [ the actual question itself isn't necessarily hard to answer. it's just a little harder to phrase. ]
...I don't know. Maybe? She, like, practiced and stuff when I was growing up. My dad didn't really care either way so it was mostly her. I never thought much of it as a kid but lately it's just...parts of it. I've been thinking about a lot more of it as things have happened.
[He is very good at context clues and what people aren’t saying which is very hilarious when up against a lot of the people here…
DON’T JUST HAND HIM THIS KNOWLEDGE???]
I see.
[Stop telling them different things challenge.]
Humans rely on many things to comfort them about what they don’t understand. The price of their knowledge of higher reasoning. Animals do not think about death in the same manner. They do not think about whether their lives have purpose outside of simply being alive. And they do not think about what comes after death.
Perhaps this is a game to test whether or not we are deserving of life, whether we take it for granted.
[ WHAT WOULD HE EVEN DO WITH IT, JUST REMIND JONAS HIS MOM IS DEAD?? BINCH HE KNOWS. ]
Could be. Or it's a game to see how much a person values what they were living for and what they'll do for it. [ same idea, different phrase. ] What do you think then, D? Do people take their life for granted, or do people have a little more awareness than that?
Oh yes, plenty of people take what they have for granted. The air they breathe, the sun on their face, the grass beneath their feet. They don't appreciate how easy it is to get food and water as opposed to those who struggle for it.
They forget their friends and family won't always be there, and when it's too late, they scurry to make a gamble to get them back. They will turn away from others so quickly to grasp whatever it is they truly desire.
[Don't just say it's weird. These are very valid and philosophical questions. D looks back at him, expression unreadable in the way it isn't any kind of expression in particular.]
It is merely I have seen many people become victim to their desires without regard for anything else around them.
Not at the time, not usually. But after it happens, so long as it was nothing fatal, they will know their mistakes if they are smart. They can change. They can do better.
Is the true not the same of you, now that you're here, Mr. Jonas? If you go back, what all would you do differently?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w1, monday
which is sort of what his thought is while he's at one of the lakes in said-park, at least until he sees D and probably t-chan nearby. i don't know t-chan's life anna you tell me. ]
Think it's an apology for being stuck in McDonald's all day Saturday?
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Yes, D is out in the park vibing. He is under a tree for the shade because he was out in the sun in other PCs for, like, five minutes and that was ENOUGH for him. T-chan is also there, lounging beside him.
T-chan lifts his head to regard Jonas.]
I will accept this apology gladly. [He's bias.] Hello, Jonas.
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speaking of demons, he is not entirely surprised that d is in the shade. he was fine being in the sun but he will mosey over to join both of them by this tree. ]
Hey. Looks like you two are definitely enjoying it.
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He offers Jonas a smile and gestures to an empty spot under the tree beside him.]
Yes. Nothing is better than a land free and open, overflowing with life. Come listen. Shhh.
[He puts a finger to his lips and then closes his eyes. Listening.]
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What am I--[ he does not get very far in his sentence when d shushes him, so he goes quiet. okay. we are going to appreciate nature, he guesses. he doesn't close his eyes or anything but he is at least silent as he seems to take in everything around them.
weird. it does feel kind of zen? also i hate that he really is just not going to talk now while they're doing this. ]
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The birds, the movement of the leaves, the fullness of the silence; his expression is so fond and serene. As if this is one of the greatest things he could do with his time.
It takes a few moments, and then he opens his eyes with a small smile to Jonas.]
Did you hear it? The voice of nature. It speaks all the time.
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so when d opens his eyes, jonas kind of grins in return. ]
It's more like...I can probably hear it but I'm not sure I can understand what it's saying. You know? [ tilting his head back to squint at the sun. ] But it's kind of nice to listen to anyway considering...everything.
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What Jonas says doesn't seem to surprise him much.] You are only one of many who aren't able to understand, but I assure you, the words are simple and clear. [HE'S SUCH A WEIRD GOTH HIPPIE GUY.]
It doesn't feel like we're dead at all, does it?
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Not in the slightest. I always figured being dead would mean not needing to eat or sleep and not being stressed out but one of those things can't be true if the other is.
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[He glances at Jonas, still with that slight smile.]
That's what the words are. What nature says if you listen. That life is born and then life expires, and then it begins again. On and on.
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...does that apply to all life, you think? Or just some lives that're selected by somebody else?
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In a way--in different ways--I think it applies to all life. Regardless of what comes in between, like this, or what people think may come after. Life begins and life ends, and that is how it goes. The natural order of the world.
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Right. No, that...could be a plausible way of life. I could see how it'd happen. [ ...this is not really the same, but it's tangentially related and he figures explaining might add context. ] ...I get that people don't really believe in, like, something higher or salvation or whatever you want to call it. But it's what my mom believed and it's sort of...I hadn't thought about it for a while. And I guess I started thinking about it again after we woke up here or whatever so. I don't know.
Maybe that's just another part of why I don't know if we're really dead or not.
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He turns his head a little to watch Jonas curiously. His expression is unreadable, but not harsh or mocking.]
There very well could be an after once this is through. Or each one of us could be different, could follow what we believe. I begin again, and you go to a paradise for reunion.
[He is quiet for a moment.]
Does to make you feel connected to her to believe in what she had?
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Could be. I heard the reapers were giving different answers on what happens to the erased souls or whatever, so that could be it. [ the actual question itself isn't necessarily hard to answer. it's just a little harder to phrase. ]
...I don't know. Maybe? She, like, practiced and stuff when I was growing up. My dad didn't really care either way so it was mostly her. I never thought much of it as a kid but lately it's just...parts of it. I've been thinking about a lot more of it as things have happened.
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DON’T JUST HAND HIM THIS KNOWLEDGE???]
I see.
[Stop telling them different things challenge.]
Humans rely on many things to comfort them about what they don’t understand. The price of their knowledge of higher reasoning. Animals do not think about death in the same manner. They do not think about whether their lives have purpose outside of simply being alive. And they do not think about what comes after death.
Perhaps this is a game to test whether or not we are deserving of life, whether we take it for granted.
[Not that he knows anything about that…]
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Could be. Or it's a game to see how much a person values what they were living for and what they'll do for it. [ same idea, different phrase. ] What do you think then, D? Do people take their life for granted, or do people have a little more awareness than that?
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Oh yes, plenty of people take what they have for granted. The air they breathe, the sun on their face, the grass beneath their feet. They don't appreciate how easy it is to get food and water as opposed to those who struggle for it.
They forget their friends and family won't always be there, and when it's too late, they scurry to make a gamble to get them back. They will turn away from others so quickly to grasp whatever it is they truly desire.
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...kind of sounds like you have some very strong opinions about that, D. Or at least some sort of experience with it.
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It is merely I have seen many people become victim to their desires without regard for anything else around them.
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but jonas doesn't seem to think anything of it, letting him look over at him. ]
Acts of desperation. [ ... ] Makes you wonder if it's worth it for them though. Or if they're ever that successful to get their desires.
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Yes. [People are desperate.] They do get what they desire, but sometimes, it does not turn out the way they had imagined.
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[ animals... ]
Do you think it's something fixable? If they get what they want but not the way they imagined. How do you change that?
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[To the first part.]
Not at the time, not usually. But after it happens, so long as it was nothing fatal, they will know their mistakes if they are smart. They can change. They can do better.
Is the true not the same of you, now that you're here, Mr. Jonas? If you go back, what all would you do differently?
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...probably nothing. Or, at least...I'd keep trying to do what I was doing before since I was trying to do things differently in the first place.
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