[ He makes a noise that's like, an intrigued hum. It's for show because he doesn't believe Count D, but his proposal is regardless interesting because what the FUCK kind of animals is this dude selling. It all sounds super crazy black market stuff. ]
Wanderin' traveler and priest. Usually wading through miles and miles of hellfire-hot sand, not a lot of water or money. Get caught up in other people's gunfights a lot. Gotta stop in motels pretty often and not all of them are pet-friendly.
There's no way Count D knows even if he's looking at him like that, but the expression on his face instantly says so much about how much he doesn't appreciate this answer. ]
What, I gotta talk to plants now? It's not like it'd understand me. 'Sides, what if it catches a bullet?
Tsk. Still just as unbelieving as the detective. He told me much the same when I gave him a plant once, too. But what do you know, it bloomed for him when he followed my instructions on how to care for it.
Plants can hear you very well actually. They are as social as any human or animal. [He makes an exaggerated expression.] You must take care of it, Mr. Wolfwood.
Is black the opposite of green? Guess I don't know my colours.
[ Womp womp, the best he knows are traffic lights.
He readjusts the hold on his cross though, belts digging into the joints of his fingers, and he looks steadily at Count D. His expression is pretty simple and nonchalant, and yet at the same time, there's nothing to be read from it. ]
[The sass. He makes a face which then smooths out into something a little softer.]
Then I would hope you'd give yourself more credit. I refuse to offer you recommendations or a pet of any kind if you can't at least pretend like you have experience caring for something.
Thanks for the call of faith, but pretty sure I'm just not fit for it.
[ He's a failure, you understand. He can't protect a thing if it keeps slipping between his fingers, if he has to claw his way to get there, if he can't look at it in the eyes. Pets are an equal relationship, it sounds like, and Wolfwood is far below. ]
I'll keep your advice in mind though, if this afterlife is treating me with spare time. Who knows, maybe I'll even have a change of heart while we're all still here.
Maybe you will. You'll return a changed man with a second chance.
[His smile is amused. He turns demurely away with T-chan, but then pauses and looks over his shoulder, sizing Wolfwood up as a whole. T-chan also looks over D's shoulder at Wolfwood.]
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Wanderin' traveler and priest. Usually wading through miles and miles of hellfire-hot sand, not a lot of water or money. Get caught up in other people's gunfights a lot. Gotta stop in motels pretty often and not all of them are pet-friendly.
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Hmmm... [He tips his head and looks contemplative for a long moment. Then he smiles knowingly and looks at Wolfwood again.] It sounds like...
You need a plant instead of an animal.
[Hehe.]
A hardy one fit for the desert. Resilient, doesn't need money, easy to take care of so long as you water it every once in a while and talk to it.
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There's no way Count D knows even if he's looking at him like that, but the expression on his face instantly says so much about how much he doesn't appreciate this answer. ]
What, I gotta talk to plants now? It's not like it'd understand me. 'Sides, what if it catches a bullet?
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Tsk. Still just as unbelieving as the detective. He told me much the same when I gave him a plant once, too. But what do you know, it bloomed for him when he followed my instructions on how to care for it.
Plants can hear you very well actually. They are as social as any human or animal. [He makes an exaggerated expression.] You must take care of it, Mr. Wolfwood.
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[ So much blood. ]
But I'll keep it in mind.
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[It's an exasperated correction since he understands what Wolfwood is getting at. STOP.]
Have you truly never had anything to protect before, Mr. Wolfwood? A plant, a pet, a... child or a lover?
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[ Womp womp, the best he knows are traffic lights.
He readjusts the hold on his cross though, belts digging into the joints of his fingers, and he looks steadily at Count D. His expression is pretty simple and nonchalant, and yet at the same time, there's nothing to be read from it. ]
Yeah. Don't we all?
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Then I would hope you'd give yourself more credit. I refuse to offer you recommendations or a pet of any kind if you can't at least pretend like you have experience caring for something.
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[ He's a failure, you understand. He can't protect a thing if it keeps slipping between his fingers, if he has to claw his way to get there, if he can't look at it in the eyes. Pets are an equal relationship, it sounds like, and Wolfwood is far below. ]
I'll keep your advice in mind though, if this afterlife is treating me with spare time. Who knows, maybe I'll even have a change of heart while we're all still here.
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Maybe you will. You'll return a changed man with a second chance.
[His smile is amused. He turns demurely away with T-chan, but then pauses and looks over his shoulder, sizing Wolfwood up as a whole. T-chan also looks over D's shoulder at Wolfwood.]
Good luck, Mr. Priest.
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You too, Count.
[ It's about the closest he's gotten to actually calling someone by name so far... good job... ]